Tag Archives: Pregnancy

Future Grandmas Beware: The Times They Are a Changin’

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Well of all things!  Pregnancy, childbirth, and baby care have changed.

How dare they!

Of course they dare.

Babies should be placed on their backs for sleeping, and please don’t cover them up with a blanket, no matter how comforting that blanket looks.  And no teddy bears in the bed either. SIDS rates have gone down remarkably thanks to these simple steps (and some others.) Yes!  What wonderful news.

There’s a baby sign language, developed because kids are able to communicate with hands before words, which sounds funky but fun. I hope I can catch on to it.

And there’s a movement (pun somewhat intended) called ” elimination communication.” You help babies use the toilet by holding them there when they give you clues they have to go. I’ll believe that one when I see it, but more power to today’s moms if they can make it work. Nobody ever said changing  a poopy diaper was  on the A List of Motherly Joys.

If you’ve just had a meal, read the next one with caution.

Since human mothers don’t consume their placentas like most (all?) mammals, there’s a trend for them to do so. If it’s too much for a mom to cook it up and eat with a knife and fork, she can have the placenta encapsulated and pop it like a vitamin. Studies have shown this helps with post-partum depression AND perhaps menopause.  I’m going to sneak one of Kath’s. I’ve got a few symptoms left.  Love to see what a little dried placenta will do. Report to come. (You can read an abstract for one study here.)

But guess what hasn’t changed?  The anticipation and wonder and happiness of carrying a child and giving birth.

That’s how Kath feels. And that’s how I feel, even more now than when I was pregnant myself.

Since menopause, I barely cry. I think my regular  this-is a-bad day or I’m mad-at-the-world tears floated away with the estrogen.

But in moments when I think about my grandbaby to be, those good old tears can come springing back.

Photo: Kath, above, reported on Baby Eats Real Food that her uterus is now the size of a a soccer ball. I’ve had a great time reading the blog and hearing what young mothers are talking about it. Hats off to them. Everywhere I go, I see darling kids. Moms of today seem to be doing a very good job, even though they don’t do it EXACTLY like we did.

Paper Plate Menopause Lady: A Craft Project

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Phew!  My friend Lisa Flinn and I just turned in a manuscript to Abingdon Press for a book of children’s programs: crafts,song, stories, games, explanations, snacks, prayers.  I’m beat, but not too beat to write up one more craft, a craft just for you!  PAPER PLATE MENOPAUSE LADY!

Those old time paper plates with the fluted edges aren’t very good for serving food, but they’re great for crafts.  Google paper plate crafts + images to see paper plates turned into everything but a workable kitchen sink.  So before I give myself a break from fluted paper plates, I have a craft for you.   She’s easy.  She’s fun.  AND she will help you express your moods kindly and gently, so family and friends will have fair warning..

Color your face when you are happy and the hormones are rolling you merrily along.

Color your face when the winds of  the Great Pause are turning that smile upside down.

No need to add age spots or wrinkles, but do color or glue/tape/staple on some hair.

Add a hanger so you can wear Paper Plate Menopause Lady around your neck.

 Simply flip her to the mood that suits you at the moment.  If you like, say this poem to all you meet, by way of explanation:

If Menopause Lady sports a frown,

That means I’m feeling oh so down,

When Menopause Lady’s mouth is up,

Life’s  as happy as a  buttercup!

I’d love to see your Paper Plate Menopause Lady when she’s finished!  Do send photos!

PS. If you’re on the younger side, consider making a Paper Plate Menopause Lady or a Paper Plate Pregnancy Lady.  You’ll have to write your own poem, though.

Around the Year in Children’s Church will be out in about six months. I’ll send an update when the book is available.  Although it’s written for Children’s Church (creative programing for young kids while adults are attending the worship service),the ideas also work well for Sunday school or preschools.