Aging, Celebrations, Children, Fashion, Menopause

White Lace and Promises: The Hunt Is Over!

Five cities.

Ten stores

And about sixty dresses.

But there was one Laura just kept thinking about.

She first tried it on in Atlanta, where she lived for the summer.  A store in Denver carries the dress, so she tried it on again while vacationing there.

Once settled back in Durham for the fall, she arranged for a loaner to be sent to a store about two hours away, one of only two stores in North Carolina to carry this particular designer.

Third time’s a charm, and if she liked it, this would be THE DRESS.

She stood in front of me, a cloud of white.


I gave it my mother of the bride major thumbs up.

“Are you sure?” she asked.


“I guess this is it,” she said, spreading her hands over the skirt. “This is the dress.”


My daughter is a shopper’s shopper.

She gazed around the room.

This store stocked dresses she hadn’t seen in any other wedding store.

“I’d like to try on just a few more,” she said to the saleswoman.

The woman returned with a fluff of dresses.

But then the 26 -year-old shopper’s shopper shook her head.  “I changed my mind.”

“So you don’t want to try these?” the woman asked.

“I don’t want to get confused. I love this dress.”

Laura turned to me.  “Do  you think I should try them on?”

If she tried on more dresses, the hunt wouldn’t be over, yet.

Sitting in the chair and watching your daughter model wedding dresses is about as fun as it gets.

You don’t have to stuff yourself into any crazy corsets. Instead you get to live the experience through a younger version, sort of, of yourself, with better skin and body and teeth and hair and who knows what else.

I took in a small breath.

My last child to be married.

My last chance to give a motherly opinion on matters of tulle and lace.

My last opportunity to comment on how the bosoms look with the neckline or the flow of the skirt or the length of the train.

The dress is gorgeous.

“No,” I said. “Get this one.”

And so the hunt, is, sigh, over.

Dress details to come after the June, 2013 wedding. The groom-to-be doesn’t spend much time on menopause blogs, but there’s no sense taking any chances.

19 thoughts on “White Lace and Promises: The Hunt Is Over!”

  1. Happy, Happy, Happy Mother of the Bride! I can ‘hear’ it in your words. Also a bit ‘whispy’ voiced. I remember my own MOB experience. I loved the dress but didn’t cry… not until my daughter tried on the veil and turned to look at me. Even saying it, I get weepy.

    It’s a wonderful experience. Enjoy. Soak it all in. And take lots of pictures. {{HUGS}}


    1. and Laura is refusing a veil. Sigh. At least she’s agreed to wear something whispy in her hair–bow/piece of tulle etc.


  2. White lace and promises…a kiss for luck and we’re on our way…thanks, I’ll be singing that to myself for the rest of the day. Which I hope relieves me of the current repeated song lyric “although I’ve never been to Spain” which has been resident for a few days now.


  3. My only daughter got married this past summer. You summed up the wonderful experience of bridal gown shopping with a daughter so beautifully. Congratulations.


  4. I have a baby girl – only 11 months old – and you made me cry reading this post. I LOVED wedding dress shopping with my mom, and I pinch myself every day that I was blessed with a daughter! I look forward to this very important shopping date with her someday. But, for now, I’m just savoring he joy of raising a daughter. It is an awesome responsibility and a great privilege.


    1. Fear in the heart is right. I learned last time you can hardly think about color. It’s all just finding a cute/elegant dress that looks good.


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