I snapped this photo while visiting daughter Laura and son-in-law Matt in Dallas. Texas has the best beer gardens. At this one, folks take turn filling in the blanks. From the looks of the crowd, I suspect these answers were chalked in by beer drinkers a lot younger than I am. I bet they contemplated their bucket lists with a much airier attitude than we older folks do.
But this post isn’t about my bucket list. It’s about coming to terms with dying. Who’s working on it?
My mother’s death, and the great courage she showed, gives me the guts to really contemplate my earthly mortality. The experts promise that accepting death helps us live the rest of our years with gratitude and gusto. Want to ponder this more? Read this article from the New York Times.
For me, one aspect is finally realizing I can’t control much of what happens after I die (because I’m dead.) Who takes my dolls and my grandmother’s china? How many years (or months!) until Cliff remarries? Will anyone remember (or keep) my published books?
What I cared about at forty, I can now let go.
But the other day we had friends coming over. I realized at the last minute that I had NOT gone over the bathroom. Yucky hair festooned the sink. My hair.
What if I weren’t here to clean the sink? What if I were dead and people came to pay their condolences to Cliff and the sink looked like it did last Friday night?
I don’t care if there are clothes piled on the chair in the hall. I don’t care if there are dishes in the sink. I don’t care if there are shoes by the back door.
Do I care about sink hair?
I told Cliff NOT to let anyone into the house until he has checked the sink. The sponge and cleaner are underneath. The picture above (which also shows my new monogrammed soap dispenser) demonstrates how I want the sink to look.
Cliff said okay. What a man! I hope he finds an adorable second wife.
I’m not ready to die yet, but I’m one mini-step closer now that I know my sink’s appearance is secured.
How about you?
What have you let go?
What do you still worry/care about after you die?