Her Period Days Are Over and Mostly Forgotten

As a younger woman, I imagined feeling daily gratitude once my period days were over. How incredible it would be!

I suffered from many manifestations of PMS that started at mid-cycle. Then the cramps hit. Basically, I had one week a month when my body felt content. Even when Cliff and I argued about this and that, I remember thinking but I suffer so from being a woman. The whole world needs to cut me a million breaks.

So am I now in a state of constant appreciation that I am period-free?

Nope.

Why?

I’m not really sure, but here are two theories:

First off, I’d love to have some of that estrogen back.

Second, menopause is a transition complete with its own problems. It’s not like a fairy suddenly waves her wand and says, “Poof. You’re done!”  As our bodies weather through menopause, I think the other problems can cloud the happy feeling of no more periods.

When I saw the above article in Oprah Magazine, I realized I don’t even think about my period anymore. In fact, it’s not even in my radar that other women are suffering like I once did. I wish all of them well of course. I just forget.

Here’s a post I wrote when the blog was brand new eight years ago about mourning the loss of periods, an emotion that surprised me then.

Am I mourning  the college girl, long gone, who dealt with periods as she juggled research papers, boyfriend, and dorm conversations that ended in happy hysterics?  Am I missing the possibility of one more sweet baby?  Am I grieving for a body that amazed me because it could count the days?  Am I worrying about the body now, which certainly seems less efficient, and the one to come?

The end of periods was very much on my mind eight years ago. It’s not now.

I’m not sure what my point is. Maybe just that life moves on. At best we embrace those changes.

What about you? Do you remember to be thankful your periods are gone? Do you miss them in any way?

And for you young ones, how anxious are you for those days to be over?

Menopause: Choose the Right Perspective (and a Book Giveaway!)

A guest post by health writer and menopause advocate Lori Ann King. Take it away, Lori, and thank you!

I believe perspective plays a huge role in how we enter menopause, regardless of whether it is natural or surgically induced, as well as in how quickly we heal.

Think back to when you first got your period. What was your perspective? Did you view it as an honor as you stepped into womanhood, like my friend Susan? Or were you more like my friend Stephanie, who viewed it as terribly embarrassing—always having accidents and not being able to go in the water at the beach for fear of bleeding through? For me, I understood that getting my period made me a woman and enabled me to have children. With my young naïve mind, I thought that the day I got my period I would become pregnant. Silly? Or the power of a child’s brain who takes things literally?

What is your perspective on menopause? Is it a time of distress and discomfort? A signal of aging? Do you fear the best years are behind you? Are you focused completely on your symptoms? Or do you see this transition as a rite of passage and a time to discover or rediscover your power, purpose, passion, and authenticity?

I love that the Chinese refer to menopause as the second spring. They consider it a time to reflect on life and turn our focus inward to nurture ourselves. That rings true for me, as this season of my life already has had an ongoing theme of self-love, self-care, and self-reflection.

Just like surgery may have benefits of alleviating pain or risk of disease, menopause can be a wonderful transition with positive side effects such as:

• No more periods, cramping, tampons, or pads.
• We can finally wear white pants again, any time of the month.
• We can enjoy sex without risk of pregnancy.
• We may have greater confidence and self-assuredness.
• We don’t have to schedule our sex lives, athletics, or vacations around our periods.

After my surgery, it took time for my body to heal physically. It took even longer for my mind and emotional health to stabilize.

There were times when I felt broken. I had to constantly remind myself that I was in a state of healing and change. Even though I felt broken, I told myself that I was whole, strong, and valuable.

Surgery and surgical menopause can be both frustrating and exhausting. The last thing we need to do is to beat ourselves up. And isn’t that one of our greatest strengths as women? We think we should heal faster, we shouldn’t cry for no reason, and we should be able to do it all… even right after a surgery. The only thing we need to do is cut ourselves some slack and remind ourselves that this too shall pass.

That’s a perspective I can embrace.

Book Giveaway:  Win a copy of Lori’s excellent and very readable book, Come Back Strong: Balanced Wellness after Surgical Menopause. For a chance to win, please enter a comment by September 20. Thanks!

Lori Ann King is a writer, speaker, certified sports nutritionist, and wellness coach with over eight years of experience in health and wellness with Isagenix. Lori currently resides in the Hudson Valley of New York with her husband, Jim, a certified personal trainer & sports nutritionist and wellness/business coach.

A Coloring Book About Menopause! (And a Giveaway)

 

A post by Avaeh Kirstopher, creator of a coloring book about one of our very favorite topics: Menopause! Take it away Avaeh, and thank you!

I am Avaeh Kristopher, a woman in my 50s who has loved animals and creating art all my life. I finally decided to create a book about menopause since it’s something I went through a few years ago.

Why? To maybe help people laugh a little bit about it and feel better about themselves through the art of coloring.

I chose bright colors for the cover because typically when people think about menopause, they don’t tend to think bright colors and fun things. They tend to think just the opposite, so I hope this coloring book will change that perception just a bit.

And I hope the sayings and the drawings and all the art inside help make your readers laugh a little bit and maybe even change their mindset some about menopause because, hey, we’re all going to go through it whether we want to or not – may as well have a good time doing it, right?

Giveaway: Avaeh is giving a copy of her coloring book to one lucky Friend for the Ride reader. For a chance to win, please enter a comment by November 25. Thanks!

Amazon Link: Here’s how you can buy a copy for yourself and copies for friends. What a great girlfriend birthday present or hostess gift.

Avaeh tells us more about herself:  I’ve led many lives while here on this planet – child, friend, partner, parent – but I’ve always been an artist too. As long as I can remember, I’ve always loved to draw, craft and sketch, have always had pets and love being in the great outdoors. My friends call me a hippie and that’s okay with me – I take it as a great compliment. I am definitely not the conventional or corporate type – I am much more of a free spirit who enjoys a good joke, colorful language and insightful conversations over high heels and the newest trends in fashion. Give me a tee shirt, jeans and some comfortable shoes any day over all of that and I’ll be as happy as can be. Now I guess I can add author to my list too. I hope you enjoy my new coloring book – hopefully the first of many to come.

Goodbye Period: Five Reasons I’m Happy and Five Reasons I’m Sad

Date of my most recent period?

2007, I think.

Nothing like filling out the form at your gynecologist’s office to make  you realize your period days really are over.

When you’re in the midst of periods, you think it’s going to be fabulous to be done.

But to my surprise, I found some bittersweet elements to being finished with periods.

And I’m delighted that Period! Magazine published my reflections. Read my article, “Goodbye Period! Five Reasons I’m Happy and Five Reasons I’m sad” right here.

Here’s the Dutch version. Very exciting to have my words translated.

What about you? If you’re finished, do you miss your period at all?

If not, can you even imagine missing your period?

And from our friends at Slumber Cloud, some herbal ideas and tea recipes for those in perimenopause and those in menopause.